I received a message asking if there was some major reason I haven’t been posting as much. Well, it’s not so much a single reason as a cluster of unfortunate events.
As you probably know, Gordon’s uncle, whom my husband viewed as his surrogate father, died. We all had a lot of grief to deal with and it’s still not done. Kid 1’s relationship broke apart and she moved back home, which I actually quietly celebrated because I wasn’t down with that relationship from the start, but it was very stressful for her. And I have developed health anxiety, which, from what I understand now, is just an new way for the professional stress to rear its ugly head.
I now have a Pavlovian response to releases: the book isn’t out yet and I already expect the flood of criticism. This is simply the cost of doing business in the internet age and I will get through it, because I always do, but it is taking a physical toll on me this time around. It’s the anticipatory anxiety. I love writing, but I’m not well set up to be an author.
I now have a stricter schedule of working out and dieting, as I’m trying to reteach my body that rising pulse doesn’t equal freaking out. I think there are two kinds of writers: those with an armor-plated ego who think they are bulletproof and nervous wrecks. My Russian father listened to me lay this all on him and recommended an hour walk every day and some good tea, which reminded me of Three Men in a Boat. Here is a link, if you read the first 5 pages, it explains it. 🙂 It’s a hilarious book.
So I haven’t posted because I don’t want to whine. I’ll try to post more and hopefully on topics that don’t involve me.
On a side note, I learned about Florence Foster Jenkins. She is known as the worst singer in the history of Western civilization.
You can learn more about her here. She once said, “People may say I can’t sing, but no one can ever say I didn’t sing. ”
I love this woman.