Gordon: Bacon is done.
Me, checking the microwave and finding that mysteriously two pieces of bacon vanished from the microwaveable bacon wrack.
Me: Hey! There were six pieces of bacon and now there is four.
Kid 2: Weird.
Me: Who took the bacon?
Kid 2: We keep trying to tell you there are ghosts in the house.
Me: Ghosts, really. This is what you’re going with?
Gordon: You’re a non-believer.